Toddler Development: Reasoning Emotions

Dealing with a stressed out toddler throwing a tantrum is not an easy task for some and some parents resort to screaming at the toddler making matters even worse. This creates more stress, the toddler will probably have even more tantrums because there’s no help in sight for them and the behavior displayed by adults makes it seem that when things aren’t going you’re way … just scream!

Why Do Toddlers Have Tantrums?

Toddlers have tantrums because something is stressing them. Maybe the toddler is tired and a toy just isn’t doing what they believe it should do, a toddler doesn’t understand the way they feel. The worst thing about a toddler not being able to understand their emotions is that they can’t voice their problems but they can understand most of what they hear.

Without a voice the toddler’s tantrum gains attention and lets people know that the toddler isn’t okay. A toddler is simply looking for help.

Validate a Tantrum

If a toddler had a voice the first thing they would say to an adult that comments, “There’s nothing to be upset about” is “Oh yeah, well you’re not me!”

Toddlers need encouragement and understanding. If it’s apparent that a temper tantrum is spawned over the resistance of a block to go in the whole where it’s supposed to go then tell the toddler that it can be a pain when the block wont go on and let them know it’s understandable but also show them what to do.

Shine Light on the Situation

Once a toddler knows someone understands how they feel, they’ll simmer down a bit but this is the time an adult should take to show a child how to realistically respond to a dilemma. Talking out the ordeal is best, an adult can rest assured that they are being listed to and a toddler will pick up the solutions, in fact later an adult can even monitor just what a toddler gained from the experience when the toddler is faced with the same problem again.

It’s best for the adult to try to teach the toddler the words to effectively voice the problems.

Toddler Language

Even if a toddler can’t form complete sentences, there are words and adults should teach a toddler how to say I’m sad, I’m mad, I’m happy, I’m hurt, I’m hungry, I’m sleepy and so on so that a toddler has the tools needed to verbalize emotions.

When a toddler knows what the emotion is, mentally the toddler can remember what to do in that kind of situation.

Everyone has good days and bad days, just because a toddler doesn’t punch a time clock or pay bills doesn’t mean they don’t know stress. Adults should empathize with their toddlers to help them make the most of a stressful situation and how to handle them in the long run. It will prove to be valuable!